All in a Name

I was pulling into my neighbors driveway so that I could shovel the snow in my own before I parked my van on it.  I was pulling in as I got the phone call. I answered the phone as the kids jumped out of the van to play with the neighbor kids. It was our dear friend Jerry who was also our adoption counselor. He said without hesitation, "You've  been chosen by a birth mom." I could hear his smile over the phone and I am sure he could hear mine as I began to ask questions. "What's the birth mom's name? When is she due? Is she healthy? Who is the birth father?" Jerry quickly began to answer my questions. As I watched my kids run around in the yard and play in the snow I learned about Victoria. She was 20 years old and four weeks away from her due date. She had broken off the relationship with the birth father and he wasn't involved. Victoria was living in a home for pregnant women and young mothers. She was working hard toward getting her GED. Then he asks, "Do you accept this baby?" My heart raced with excitement as I gave my answer,"Yes!" I will never forget that January 28th day.



Victoria while pregnant with our baby girl.



Several day later I paced my kitchen floor. The kids were in their rooms playing with the threat of being grounded for the rest of their lives if they came out. I watched the clock as the numbers ticked away. Any minute the phone would ring and I would get to talk to Victoria for the very first time. I was terrified. What if she didn't like me and changed her mind? How do I convey my love for her and her baby without sounding like a complete nut? Then the phone rang. I jumped at the sound. Jerry asked if I was ready and then introduced Victoria to me. I asked her how she was feeling and what her future plans were. She told me that she was doing really well and the pregnancy has been very easy. She wanted to get her GED and then go to college. Then she told me that she was planning on naming the baby Faith Elizabeth but that I didn't need to keep it. We both knew it was meant to be when I explained that the name Faith Elizabeth was on our list for a baby name. She had picked the name Faith because the pregnancy had changed the path she had been on and strengthened her faith in God. She wanted the name Elizabeth because that is her own middle name and she wanted Faith to have her name. She was so excited to hear that we were considering the name. We loved the name Faith because we had taken a complete step of faith to adopt and we just loved the name Elizabeth.  I loved talking to her. It was like we had known each other forever. I sometimes think that the name Faith was put on our hearts to help us grow closer together and have peace that this is definitely His will.

My precious daughter

For so long I have prayed for a little girl to hold.

Her eyes so blue and her hair of gold.

I waited so patiently year after year.

Time and time again, "It's a boy" is what I would hear.

My plans have changed and my vision too.

You won't grow in my belly but still I wait for you.

Although our features we do not share.

I dream of your round brown eyes and your curly brown hair.

I long to touch your soft cheek.

To smell your fragrance so sweet.

I am not the only one who waits for you.

You also have a daddy and four brothers, too.

They talk about the day of your very first date.

I can see it now as all five site at the door and wait.

For they will hold your hand as you learn to walk.

And they will giggle as you learn to talk.

They will run beside your bike as you begin to ride.

But letting go of you will be a much harder stride.

Though we have never held you in our arms you are already in our hearts.

You have been loved by three all in parts.

First by God who is knitting together for you both a body and a soul.

Then by your birth mother, for you to have a life with a loving family was her goal.

And so very soon we will be holding you, our family you complete.

We will wait and pray for God to keep you safe and far from harm until we meet.